Also, my friend Cheryl has an appointment in two weeks with her doctor about her post-treatment scan. The only thing he would tell the nurse to tell her was "there is improvement". That really irritates both of us! Why make the appointment about the scan 4 weeks after it if there is only "improvement"?? PLUS.....the nurse told her all her blood work numbers look GREAT, like pre-cancer levels. So she and I have decided we are going to feel guardedly optimistic about her results!! :-)
I am still NOT on my computer very much, even my Pinterest activity is VERY reduced. I am having a hard time finding excitement or JOY about my insignificant little pursuits around here. I haven't finished painting my kitchen cabinets......SO??? I haven't made a pomegranate wreath I was so excited about......SO??? I haven't taken any pictures of the things I thought were really fun around here, before.....SO??? *sigh!*
Like I said before, I really struggle with LOSS and my faith in a loving God. Along with my prayers of "PLEASE, PLEASE heal/protect my loved ones!!!", I always have to pray that He will help me to trust Him even when I don't get the answers I want (which has happened alot). So this morning, as I was trying to clean up my browser pages that I keep leaving open (I bet I have over 100 windows open!), I saw part of this pin underneath my pin of a recipe, and I clicked on it......
Here's the link to Pinterest..... http://www.pinterest.com/pin/508132770428580592/
I think God put it right there for me to see!!
The last part is what really spoke to what I feel and need in my life when I cannot understand God -- "I may not be able to see the BLESSING in this situation, but I ask You for the STRENGTH to accept it as it is...."
Seeing this pin after many days of praying that God will help my faith stay strong tells me that God IS listening to me, He IS in control of this situation, and He DOES want me to keep my faith strong! I am SO GRATEFUL that He answered my prayer this way!!
So I wanted to post this in case it could help anyone else who might read this. Plus, I really wanted to point out what God has done for ME -- His puny, whiny, faith-questioning child. When I reached out to Him, He was RIGHT THERE. FOR ME. And since I have no problems complaining loudly, I absolutely had to THANK Him "loudly", as well!
So I will continue to plod along, praying for healing and strength, and TRUSTING that God is at work here. I don't think this will give me my JOY back, but it has given me comfort and a stronger faith. That's my stepping stone to JOY!! :-)
Thank You, God!